whip by my side
i start my adventure
my father's pride
and my business ventures

led to indentured potential invention
a new scheme of power and wealth and ascention,
slid past the gauntlet amidst the dissention
i can almost hear him, begin your descent son (walk)

-

in a minor predicament
threw a rock at a bat, hit it
bounced right back, knocked me flat,
innit great, what's at stake, when im at my health limit
but wait a minute

2 levels back, found that bitch and i kissed her
gee what a slut you know i dont miss her
she looked at me and said <thanks a lot mister
my lips are imbued, i'm a mystery sister

rescue us, your whip is your sword
we're hidden deep under, we make it hard,
but carry us over you'll get your reward
i give you my heart, leaving a scar>

then she fell to the ground in a sudden heap,
this is the sacrifice that i reap,
was her life worth these coins that i keep?
guess i'll never know, hey wait, a shopkeep

promise of power untelling he tells me
<share a few coins with the luck of hell's belly
games can't be rigged, the die tell no lies see
you'll surely win, a prize rectifies>

this offer so lofty i just couldn't pass
the item that appeared behind frosted glass
nervous, my fingers, they fumbled the pass,
dice lost he shoots me, <die you thieving ass!>,

running so desperate i leap through the air
barely avoiding his shotgun's death stare
cornered with nowhere to run, yikes,
woops he just landed in some deadly spikes

shotgun in hand i continue my quest
what epic foes might i come across next
confidence grows like i just passed a test,
this message i see in pixelized text: --
[LEVEL 4 COMPLETED] (walk)


if theres a king of this jungle i hope i dont meet him
monkey swings round in sheol's arboretum
if he don't return all my coins i dont needem
but i'll find a big old green plant that could eat him

wrestled by a piggybacked furry ancestor
I trip and I fall with unworried molestor
by grabbing a branch i halt my plunge,
thanks to his poor stance, the primate's expunged

shanks towards our motion a mechanized spear,
to climb up would be too risky i fear, but
the felled simian has yet to go crash,
instead in its place i hear a faint splash

ignoring submursion aversion i dive,
hoping the fall will not take me alive
murky depths seem to rise up to greet me,
realize it has eyes and a great mouth to eat me

kick and a splash and a plan to elope
fish out of water has nothing on rope
free from the jaws and arboreal grope
I depart from this wood gripping to hope

-

chill and shiver, dark delivers
a slippery slope, a precarious perch
slide on ice to a rock that lurches under my weight
fall straight as the bait for what foe awaits
i detect near, with abject fear,
it smells like wet fur in here

with a trembling howl stalagtites become mites
through new holes i roll in shaking fright
too worried and hurried caution is thrown,
as am i as white apes toss me from their throne

glancing downwards i scan to land, is that metal and glass?
until a little green man I squash with my ass
his saucer so dainty, it falls while i'll dangle
thankfully far from volatile wide angle'd
explosion that blasts my escape route to shambles
time to gamble,

a bottomless pit. too far to jump
sick of this shit. i'm just gonna jump
sprinting I prep for a do or die
at the last step, a SPROING sends me high
I land at my goal, far from the edge,
in debt to a boobytrap spring-loaded ledge

-

in a brick laid corridor
I stick to the floor before
i'm sucked dry by flies from a big dead guy,
mummified behemoth,
light a bomb and i heave it,
don't grieve it, the reign of the interceptor
all that remains of his remains is a splintered sceptre
through the tempermental temple best believe i kept'er

priests i'd guess in red headress
stood at an altar but not to bless,
as for the rest they were bound and diced,
made my egress past the sacrifice

violet bubbles raised men as they seize,
i hear a rumble 'kali is pleased'

-

(i) feel a sense of dread, heads of red,
prostrate towards a huge stone head,
it levitated, squashed them dead,
worshippers flattened as they fled.

it fixed its golden eyes on me
and drops as I roll to safety
close call but now I see
cracks in the floor, magma beneath

i begin to sin, as I sense an end, to this deity's stomping spree
I know that I could flee with ease but this false idol ends with me
with every miss the maw mashes earth but missed me by an inch
maybe the totem's flaw is in - strategic intelligence

I stage myself on unstable turf,
trying not to estimate the statue's worth,
it predictably, floats towards me
and breaks through crust to guarantee
victory

-

so i sold all the gold, and i've told my secrets,
son that's what hard work and diligence gets!
my story's all true, now don't you forget it,
I kept the gold sceptre, don't make me go get it.